Good day, sir/madam/person! This is the Failures Asked Questionably section of the forum. What's that, you ask? Simply, this is where we answer common questions about the inner workings of failure. By reading this guide, you'll learn from the experts how to become a true failure master! This is the official FAILFORUMIFY® guide, written by the incredibly handsome fail overlord, Ice Flower. Let's get this over with!
1) What is a failure?
fail·ure
/fālyər/
noun
1. lack of success.
"an economic policy that is doomed to failure"
synonyms: lack of success, nonfulfillment, defeat, collapse, foundering
This is the dictionary definition of failure, but it is in fact so much more. Here at FAILFORUMIFY®, failure is not just a lack of success, but a success all its own. We take failures to an artform, so much so that our main currency is Fails. In our various forums, we catalog all sorts of failures, so be sure to check them out.
2) What is the opposite of a failure?
The opposite of failure is success - this is undesirable as it means you have accomplished a goal and you have a meaningful purpose outside of FAILFORUMIFY®. Continuous and repeated examples of success will be banned, terminated, and burninated. Violently.
3) How do I become a failure?
I'm glad you asked! We here at FAILFORUMIFY® are experts in the art of failure and we'll gladly teach you, Hypothetical New User, how to learn in the arts of the fail.
There are three main steps to becoming a failure:
a) Don't succeed. No exceptions. If you are asked to do something, do the opposite. Unless the FAILFORUMIFY® mods are gonna ban you for that ****, then follow them by all means possible.
b) Put as little effort into it as possible. What is "it", you ask? "It" is anything. Artwork, forum posts, FAQs... as long as you don't put in effort, you are failing. At FAILFORUMIFY®, we aren't prejudiced and will welcome all sorts of failure, so don't be afraid to show your laziness.
c) Every single day, stress comes in every way. I ain't got no time for nobody. My style is rich, dope, phat in which, we'll make a cake today that looks rich!
By following these simple steps, you too can become a true failure like the masters at FAILFORUMIFY®. Just look at these fantastic results!
"By failing to put effort into coding a forum, I have become head administrator of FAILFORUMIFY®. It's all thanks to this simple guide!"
-- Bobithan, creator and head administrator of FAILFORUMIFY®
"I finally became a true failure after abandoning a popular forum for two years. Now I have become a true master."
-- Ice Flower, local power-up and incredibly handsome fail overlord
"How did you get into my house"
-- some man, some man
Once you've mastered becoming a failure, you can finally use FAILFORUMIFY® to its full potential. You might even bake a cake! ...Wait, no, that requires effort. Just buy one.
4) Is that all there is to failure?
Good heavens, no! As any true failure knows, you must keep practicing in the art of the failure to continue improving. One good way to do so is by perusing the forums at FAILFORUMIFY® often, and keeping tabs on the failures and disgraces therein. This guide will be constantly updated with the latest in failure techniques and information, as well. Keep practicing at failure and perhaps you can even become a fail czar! Whatever that means. I think it's a type of fancy dessert.
This is the end of the guide for now, but remember that it will be updated from time to time. Thank you for reading, and good luck on your personal fail journey!